I woke up in the middle of the night yesterday and couldn't go to sleep. I needed to pee but I had the most massive erection in the world. It was just there, hard as a rock, immobile. I tried everything I could to get it down- I thought about gore, animals, teletubbies and war; but no matter how hard I tried, the boner would not subside. Hitting critical point I made my way to the toilet in an attempt to complete a feat no man has successfully accomplished yet-peeing with a boner without wasting a drop.
I knew standing in an upright position would not allow me to successfully complete the mission so I thought about sitting on the toilet and peeing like women. Unfortunately my penis would not fit in the toilet. The shower suddenly looked very tempting but cleaning afterwards would not be fun and I might miss a spot. So I did the only thing left in my list of option. I bent down push up style and peed. SUCCESS! The position was at the perfect angle of elevation in comparison to my penis. This meant the degree in which the piss entered the toilet ensured no drops fell victim to gravity and missed. That fellow reader is how you pee with a boner.
PROBLEM SOLVED!
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