Saturday, November 14, 2009

My Job as a salesman



Well, I just got a job-as a salesman. Job description- I get to walk around in searing heat "trying" to get people to buy wax. Sounds fun? (I'd rather stick to masturbating). Although I have to admit, this wax spray is pretty awesome. You can do so many things with it;-wash cars, clean windows, and self protection device, use it as a mild explosive device and sniffing it can probably get you high. Despite this, it’s still hard to try convincing people to part ways with their hard earn moolah.

On my first day on the job, I followed a top gun salesman and their team as we went around trying to get people to buy awesome wax. It’s a tough job, need a toilet break? May I introduce you to adult nappies? Angry people? Well I just use my wax spray as defence. The only good thing about this job is talking to different people. Some have big noses, others have thick moustaches (even some of the ladies) but every one of them is a dollar cow waiting to be milked kaching!(I've sold my soul haven't I?) Lunch break consisted of smoking cigarettes and checking how much I have sold. One guy smoked so much he had his own tobacco bag to save money and was rolling them himself. Every one of the salesman smoked so maybe it's a job perquisite? Once again I managed to attract awkward attention by getting sprayed in the face. Here I was holding the door for the salesman when the wind blew the spray into my face as he was giving a demonstration, involuntarily I swore and that sale obviously didn’t go very well. I’m surprised they even hired me.

I'm worried though since when I talk, sometimes spit flies out and if it does hit someone in the eye-whose going to pay compensation?