It has come to this, after two months of blogging, i will finally talk about the holy one-not Michael Jackson but the Holy GOD! Who better to find out about god than god himself! So yesterday night, i prayed for god to reveal himself unto me. Guess what, in the mail the next day, i got fined for illegal parking! However going through the pile i noticed a white letter and omg(no pun intended) was i surprised, it was a letter by god himself written to me!(DISCLAIMER:Actual praying results will vary). Below is that letter.
Dear HappyHobo
yoooooo broooo wassup man? Its your holy father dude, i love you mannnn. How you doing? wait i already know that, anyways, sorry for the long delay in replying dude, usually I'm omnipotent and shit but i get lots of fanmail. I know your asking yourself why does god swear and talk like a hippy? Well contrary to popular belief, I'm pretty shizzle yah dig, i mean talking like "the lordeth giveth and the lord taketh" makes me sound like a homosexual with a lisp. Anyways dawg, ill give you a bang for my life story mkay? I'm three things in one! that's right, I'm the value package-if you believe in me, you get three for the deal of one! I'm god, then i fathered myself into that virgin chick but I'm also a spirit-pretty cool right? Well, i kinda got bored up in heaven with those angels, i mean all day they just sing and poop like birds so i created your decedents just for fun. Anyways, one of my angels must have had something really high up his a## because he tried to f&ck with my new toy. So being the awesome god(I'm full of awesomeness), i kicked his butt out and he turned into a snake and brought his own home somewhere really hot. My real estate agent told me though my property is worth more than his so I'm pretty happy. One day I'm going to kick his a$$ but i just cant be bothered you know? I'm like the biggest procrastinator. Anyways that pretty much summarises my life up till now.
hope you enjoy meatloaf for dinner.
Peace out Yall
xxx lots of love GOD
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