Everyone loves dogs-mans best friend-or is it really mans best friend? I thought the penis was a man's best friend. Anyways back to the point, its Saturday morning and I'm trying to enjoy a stroll through the park, 20 metres away is a skinny women with a huge dog, when i say huge, i mean you can probably put some make-up on it and put it into a Lord Of the Rings movie with the Dark Lord riding this thing. Immediately i wonder how you walk a dog that size without it walking you. Then i noticed the dog wasn't leashed. The dog looked at me, i looked at it. Normally I am not afraid of dogs, but when a dog that looks like a sumo on four legs starts charging at you at high speeds, thats a different story. Recalling watching a TV show about dogs, i froze dead in my tracks hoping the dogs vision was like stripper vision, and if i turn inanimate it won't see me. 10 metres......5 metres....moment of impact......
Expecting the dog to run around me in circles or whatever dogs do when they see people, my expectation was cut short when i lost full feeling in my right leg. The stupid dog had charged at me and instead of veering off it smashed facefirst onto my kneecap. The owner seeing that her dog couldnt walk straight called out its name. By now the dog was walking in a drunk fashion but finally decided a bird was more interesting than me. The owner did not bother to even apologise. Moral of this story-don't worry about leashes if you have a big dog, instead consider investing in a tranquilizer gun.
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